2012 was, in many ways a pretty shitty year for me all in all, particularly discovering I had cancer, although naturally discovering it could, and, indeed, has been, cured was a pretty major plus. 2012 had a shitty ending for me and 2013 didn’t start any better – well separated by only a second they were never likely to be too radically different were they? The other night I found myself starting to get down and, as I’ve done before, I wrote a poem to try to work out just what the problem was and how I might address it: here’s the result – the reference to The Black Mists is to an earlier poem which is on my poems tab from my home page.
The black mists surround me.
I can smell them in air,
And ‘though I cannot see them,
I know that they are there.
They skirmish through the undergrowth,
Lie hidden in the trees,
But I won’t let them fry my brain,
No, they won’t capture me.
I’m stronger now than ever I was,
In body, speech and mind.
I’ll concentrate upon my breath,
Until I free my mind.
Since starting to write this particular poem things do seem to be maybe taking a turn for the better. I have an interview tomorrow for a temporary job as an “interventionist” in a local school, and a telephone interview for a job in Wisconsin next Thursday, so, maybe hanging onto my mind worked!